Tuesday, July 29, 2008

I hate to say the word insomniac, but...

Have you ever had a night where going to sleep was something you knew you just weren't going to get around to for a while?

I have these nights often.

I plug my computer into an amp I keep in my room. Nothing else uses this amp, I don't plug an instrument of any kind into it. I just keep this gigantic speaker in my room to plug in to my computer on nights when everything else seems better than sleep.

I play calm songs, with a lot of bass in them. I like to feel it. I like to imagine the song as an object. Some songs are large chunks of bass with miniature people standing on top, riding the bass like surfers. These people are the mid tones and treble. I lean against the speaker with a book. It makes a horrible cushion, the bass shakes me and I have to squint the slightest bit to keep the words clear. But I lean on it anyway, I like the company of the tiny surfers. I like the overbearing presence of the bass.

Times like this, I wish I was an artist. I wish I could make you all think. I wish I could keep you guys up all night wondering about something I said.

I wish I could give you all my amp and a good book.

I wish you were me. My work would be done.